Tuesday, October 4, 2011

"So you're not good at that, huh?"

So a few years ago I was on a house hunting tour of Boston with a husband/wife realtor team.  The wife was especially prim and proper...almost prudish in her demeanor.  Kind of uptight...maybe she went to church a lot...I dunno.

Anyway, after touring a bunch of towns, she and her husband were kind enough to treat me to an impromptu lunch they brought in a cooler in the back of their SUV.

It was an impressive spread actually...Grapes, good bread, cold cuts, cheese...and homemade brownies.  Light snacky stuff to tide us over until dinner...

The wife had artfully fanned a bunch of sliced cheddar cheese on a board.  As I reached for a slice of cheese and a cracker she remarked, "Have you seen this?" as she held up a package of Cracker Barrel extra sharp, pre-sliced cheddar cheese...I actually had not and asked where she found it...

She replied excitedly, with her husband standing next to her, "Just at the grocery!  I love that it's pre-sliced for crackers because I'm really terrible at cutting cheese."

(***vinyl record scratch as awkward silence hits us as all of us realize what she just said**)

I felt the corners of my mouth nearly spasm from trying to keep myself from smiling...amused at this prima donna's little fart faux pas statement.  I needed to laugh.  I couldn't control it.

So I pointed to a random robin...maybe it was a crow...some kind of bird...pointed and laughed as it stood still in the street.  As though this bird thinking about the next place it was going to shit was the funniest most animated creature nature had bestowed on the street that day...

I'm sure the husband knew what I was really laughing at.  He probably just didn't want to catch hell.

Outta here....


  1. Hahahaha! I don't think I would have been able to keep a straight face.

  2. Smedette - I did a really bad job trying to not laugh. In fact, I failed miserably. Did I mention the bird was just standing there?