Do you guys remember this episode of Fantasy Island? The Mermaid one?
Being the naive kid I was when I initially saw this episode, I was all, "Aw, sweet. He's in love with the mermaid."
Now as a learned adult, I have some general observations as well as questions regarding this story.
First, I want to say I so know he saw some serious mermaid boobage right? I mean, they were frolicking amongst the coral and all in the beginning. Her hair had to have swished away from her chest, right? And that embrace as they kissed? Come on...Her nips had to have been as hard as diamonds from all that swimming. I also noticed his cheeks were puffed as he held his breath under water. Aren't you supposed to be able to breathe? Kind of fake...as far as swimming with mermaid scenes go...
How did they get to that rock they were leaning against? Did he drag her there? I guess she isn't one of those "Develop a fin when my legs get wet" types. Or maybe I'm confusing Daryl Hannah. He seems pretty chivalrous so I'm going with the "Dragging the fish" theory...
And his breathless, "That was an incredible experience! Unbelievable!" Who describes a date as an "experience"? He sounds as though he just test drove a sports car don't you think?
And I want to knock that phony "tortured mind" look off his cranium...I found myself thinking, "Dude! She wants to put out! Why so glum? What's a little skin pruning? Catch some tail! Literally! Go!!!"
She's a bit of a whorish mermaid too I think. Did you see how she said, "When we become 'one', you will be a merman..." I didn't catch a wink after she said that...Would have been cute and flirty I think..Like, she wanted to keep him guessing whether she meant "after coitus". I guess his swim trunks were too tight to remove for this jaunt, and maybe she's reminding him, "Hey if I'm swimming nude, so should you you freaking nincompoop..."
And that cheap kiss at the end. She's a total tease. If I were his friend, I'd just advise him to double check on the "Return Policy" so to speak.
I don't remember how this ends...Maybe I'll check out Part II....
Outta here!!!
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